Bullz-Eye’s TCA 2011 Winter Press Tour Wrap-Up: Kneel Before Oprah!

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The TCA Winter Press Tour is an event which never quite seems to live up to the TCA Summer Press Tour…but, then, that stands to reason, as the mid-season series rarely match the ones which hit the airwaves in the fall, right? Still, the experience never fails to be one which I enjoy, mostly because you never know what's going to be around the corner, and Day 1 really set the stage for that: during the course of 12 hours, I interviewed Betty White, Henry Rollins, and Bruce Jenner, and, thanks to National Geographic, I wore a giant snake around my neck. I suppose it's a testament to how many famous people I've met over the years, though, that one of the biggest reasons I look forward to the tour is not because of who I might interview but, rather, because I'll get the chance to hang out with the friends I've made within the TCA. Swear to God.
Most entertaining panel by a broadcast network: "Made in Spain" (PBS)
Most entertaining panel by a cable network: "An Idiot Abroad" (Science Channel)
In retrospect, there's no way they could've been funnier if they'd actually been onsite. Most annoying panel: "Platinum Hit" (Bravo)
Between Kara DioGuardi handling a question about "American Idol" about as poorly as she possibly could have – read more about that here – and Jewel dropping names like they were hot potatoes ("I was talking to Steven Spielberg), I'm hard pressed to think of any panel that left a worse taste in my mouth.
Panel which had the least need for an audience: "The Best of Laugh-In" (PBS)
It wasn't entirely surprising that a panel consisting of Lily Tomlin, Jo Anne Worley, Ruth Buzzi, Gary Owens and George Schlatter would be able keep things moving along without any of the critics in attendance actually needing to ask a question, but they kept passing the conversational ball back and forth until someone in the crowd finally had to stand up and ask if it was okay to ask a question. Schlatter instantly shot back, "We're trying to talk here!" Laughter ensued, as did plenty of questions about the history of "Laugh-In." "Are you guys having fun?" Funniest panel that you probably had to be there to appreciate: "Community" (NBC)
If I tried to tell you about it, though, you'd probably just stare blankly at me. Greatest Moment of Complete Honesty During the Tour: When I approached Jack McBrayer ("30 Rock") to ask him a question, he agreed, but then he looked down at my recorder and said, "Oh, my! Most common recurring question during the panels: "Who's the moral center of your show?"
Most promising new cable program that I didn't know much about before going into the tour: "Too Big to Fail" (HBO)
Least promising new broadcast network program that I didn't know anything about before going into the tour: "America's Next Great Restaurant" (NBC)
One of the critics asked, "Do you remember Rocco's DiSpirito's TV show, 'The Restaurant'?" Who cares?
My best opening salvo for an interview: telling Malcolm McDowell that I really loved his audio commentary for "Caligula."
Favorite moment during a one-on-one interview: Phil Morris channeling the spirit of Lord Buckley.
We were talking about the character of Jackie Chiles, which Morris played on "Seinfeld" and has recently revived for FunnyOrDie.com. Morris – now on TV One's "Love That Girl!" Morris burst out laughing and offered a fist bump, praising me for "digging deep," but I dare say the same praise could be lavished on him as well.
Favorite one-on-one interview overall: Tyler Labine, "Mad Love" (CBS)
I met him during my first TCA tour in 2007, back when he was pimping the premiere of "Reaper," and between Facebook, phoners, and further TCA events…well, I wouldn't be so presumptuous as to say we're friends, but we've definitely built a comfortable rapport when it comes to our conversations. Most intimidating roundtable interview: Tommy Lee Jones, "The Sunset Limited" (HBO)
How do you turn down the chance to sit in the presence of that guy? I've already answered that question." Least successful one-on-one interview: Mike Tyson, "Taking on Tyson" (Animal Planet)
When he swaggered into the evening event which was held by the OWN Network but encompassed all members of the Discovery Channel family, I thought, "Okay, I work for a guys' website: I have to talk to Mike Tyson." I approached him and asked him a question revolving around how he's suddenly a media presence again, first with "The Hangover" and now with this new series. My 7 Favorite Cheap Thrills of the Tour:
1. Meeting the Fonz. I'm thrilled for him, though, that the work offers are coming in fast and furious: he was at the tour as a cast member for both Adult Swim's "Childrens Hospital" and USA's "Royal Pains."
I'm pretty sure this means I'll never get cancer!

3. Calling Elijah Wood on **** up my shopping at Amoeba Music last tour. Wood was at the Fox party to promote his new FX series, "Wilfred," and when I found a chance to chat with him, I said, "First, I've got a photo I want to show you." "Yeah," I replied, "and you were also totally blocking the bargain bin. That totally sucked." 4. Interviewing Paris Hilton. 5. Successfully asking Jerry Rice a question about football, despite the fact that I don't know anything about football, let alone Jerry Rice. The only time his family's TV series came up was when one of his daughters called to tell him that they'd won the People's Choice Award for Guilty Pleasure…and it didn't even occur to me to ask which daughter!
Most awesome visit to the set of a network show: "Parks & Recreation" (NBC)
Sweet! That dude is awesome!" Most awesome visit to the set of a basic cable show: "Conan," TBS
Best piece of swag: If you were to ask my daughter, it'd probably be the game of Jenga that was offered up during Fox's "Raising Hope" breakfast, which, although she'd never played it before I brought it home, has taken to it like a duck to water. I've been a member of the TCA since 2007, and I think I've been able to fit into maybe two of the 50+ promotional shirts I've gotten in that time. Thank God I was given advance warning that it was waiting in the room for me…
Best off-site visit that wasn't connected to the tour: to The Vanguard for the taping of two episodes of "The Green Room with Paul Provenza."
Let's do other stuff." What an incredible evening: free food, an open bar (I don't mind telling you that the Newcastle was going down smoooooooth), and some seriously funny people, including Lewis Black, Ron White, Kathleen Madigan, Jamie Kilstein, Richard Lewis, Margaret Cho, Jeffrey Ross, and Kumail Nanjiani. Other comedians, including Rick Overton, Doug Stanhope, and David Feldman, were in the house, as were Sugar Ray Leonard and Ron Jeremy.
I think my personal favorite one-liner came when Ron White denied being an alcoholic, explaining, "I only drink when I work," then adding, "But I am a workaholic." ("Hey, look, Ron Jeremy must have an erection! Good times, to be sure.
Most awesome live performance of the tour: David Foster, promoting "Great Performances: Hitman Returns – David Foster and Friends" for PBS.
PBS really did right by us on this tour. Best party: Fox
Most pleasantly surprising party: Hallmark Channel
Worst party: ABC / CBS (tie)
I understand that the networks don't feel the need to go quite as all-out with their winter tour functions as they do during the summer, but the ABC and CBS network families took cost-cutting to a depressing low. Okay, I understand why ABC would only offer up talent from their mid-season shows, but given that most TCA members only get out to the west coast twice a year, it was depressing not to have the chance to interview cast members from their other series. Meanwhile, CBS didn't even have a party. Most annoying moment of the tour: having Sara Rue's personal publicist start tapping her watch at about 90 seconds into my attempt to interview her client.
I love Sara Rue. Having little choice in the matter, I wrapped the interview and thanked Rue, who seemed to have enjoyed our short time together, but my plans to do a full-length piece offering a look at "Shedding for the Wedding" as well as an exploration of Rue's earlier career had been shot all to hell.
Next TCA tour, though, I'm thinking about wearing a t-shirt to all press events which reads, "Just because you don't know me doesn't mean I suck."
Okay, last time I ended on my most annoying moment of the tour, and it felt woefully anticlimactic, so this time I'm going to end with a few laughs and offer up…
The Top 11 Quotes from the TCA Tour (one for each day of the tour):
I knew I was coming here to share time at PBS, but all of a sudden it's, like, 'The room is going to be full of TV critics.' Great: all my life dealing with food critics one by one, and now I'm going to have to be dealing with an entire room of TV critics…?" – Jose Andres, "Made in Spain" (PBS)
2. "What is this Betty White business? – Betty White, "Hot in Cleveland" (TV Land)
3. "Betty White is in the building. – Ed Asner, "Working Class" (CMT)
– Rob Corddry, "Children's Hospital" (Adult Swim)
I'm here to talk about pigeons and stuff. – Mike Tyson, "Taking on Tyson" (Animal Planet)
6. "If Oprah would have asked me to ride a unicycle naked and backwards at night, I would have asked her, 'Where do I sign up?' It's Oprah." – Mark Burnett, Your OWN Show (OWN)
They've already got Bryant Gumbel. – Oprah Winfrey, Owner of OWN
– Julie Bowen, "Modern Family" (ABC)
Steven Tyler: Fuck no. (Pauses) I question whether I should have done that just now.
– Robert King, "The Good Wife" (CBS)
11. "Do you guys ask questions for a profession? You're pretty good. You don't look like much as a group, but…good questions." – Steve Young, "Year of the Quarterback" (ESPN)


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